Parenting 101 (dusted off from sometime last summer)

I’m sure you’re all clamoring to know-

What’s the most valuable parenting skill I’ve acquired after having survived the first year of 2 babies 15 months apart?

Oh, you weren’t wondering after all? That’s okay. I’ll just remind myself- in case I need these later. You know what? On second thought, I’ll jot down my top five:

  1. Laugh

    Because if you don’t, you’ll cry. Or yell- and then they’ll cry. There’s nothing worse than three kids 3 yrs and under all crying at the same time.

  2. Give

    Not really stuff that costs money, but stuff. Heart rocks, a picked flower- I once found myself saving a green beetle for Levi. You might just give a helping hand- do one of their chores for them, and leave a calling card; tape special notes to the treats you’re handing out anyway. It will make you look thoughtful, and loving… Well- you are, right?

  3. Listen

    No, I mean really listen. Cause nobody wins when you realize too late that you said “yes” to the question, “Mom, can I chase down the ice cream truck naked?” Not that that has ever happened to me. I’m just saying.

    Also. All I’m saying is- kids will watch/ listen to what you want to watch/ listen to. So you should probably know all the words first. Just saying…

    And one more thing- listen to them. Sit down (or lay down- in any case, act like you have time), and ask how their day was, or for them to tell you about that thing they built with blocks, or that picture they made, or anything…. And wait. I promise you’ll like them more- and you won’t be looking so shabby yourself. Way to go, Mom.

  4. Just throw it away

    Sustainability is great, but my most sustainable resource? My sanity. Just throw away the poopy underwear. I won’t tell. Also, that toy you can easily mend if you had fifteen minutes? You don’t- have fifteen minutes, I mean. Ditto for your husband’s ideas about duct tape or super glue. Chances are in most cases, you couldn’t pay someone to take that thing you’re contemplating saving- and time is money. Especially your time. Trust me. Let it go, man, let it go…

  5. Remember

    The epi pens, the snack, the wipes, the diapers, your sanity- on second thought, just keep the epi pens attached to you, and leave the rest in the car. It’s easier that way.

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